Why do I send gifts for every occasion? Why do we spend the better part of a Sunday morning making a craft for their mom’s birthday?
Because, although I believe their mom is still in denial about the upcoming trial, I also believe she has felt some of our respect for her, and given us respect back. Because, we are so grateful that she has not made the girls feel in the middle, and not said bad things about us.
Because I am not her social worker, her friend, her lawyer, or her therapist. I am [one of] the other mother [s] of her children.
My only role is to help make this transition as easy as it can be for them. It is difficult, stressful, challenging, maddening for us. And we are adults. With a little bit of control here. I can’t imagine the swirl of emotions and loss of control the kids are feeling.
Feeling like they need to pick sides, certainly won’t help them. And, let’s face it–We are always going to lose that game.
Hopefully, if the girls feel that they can get closer to us, and still maintain their relationship with their mom in some form, it might be easier. If mom knows that we respect who she is, she has shown that respect to us.
And why do I do it?
Because making this craft is Damn Cute.