My Daughters

Tonight, Carrot was hurting.

I see Carrot and Zucchini for a few minutes, twice a week, as they pick up Pumpkin for visitation.

We have these conversations, that feel so unbalanced. I know that someday soon they are moving into our house, and someday soon after that they will be my daughters. My brain always jumps three steps ahead (that’s the girl who is going to be my daughter), and then jumps back (but, first she’ll be my foster daughter.)

It feels similar to when I was dating Croi, and thought, “that’s the woman who I am going to marry and have babies with.”

Moments feel more significant when you know they will be the foundation for a lifetime. I’m falling in love with these girls.

I know we might have a lot of yuck and muck before then, but the cool thing about being a grown-up, is I know one day, they will be my daughters.

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About EratMama

30 something midwestern gal, married to another 30 something midwestern gal, conquering depression, rockin' foster parent.
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4 Responses to My Daughters

  1. wishinghopingpraying says:

    It’s hard to live both in the present and future. I remember that feeling well. I will tell you that the moments where you are able to see the future will carry you through the yuck and muck. Good luck!

  2. Monica says:

    So sweet. Congratulations on your future daughters. Your mother love is a beautiful, beautiful thing. Thank you for sharing.

  3. Therese says:

    I just thought of a summer at CCB when you were the counselor for a group of girls in an archery program and you named them “Wilma Tells”. That’s what I think of when I think of you being a mom to those girls. You’re a natural…which is the part most of us have to learn. So the yuck and muck will be long and hard, but after a while it will be over. And you will still be a natural, married to another natural.

  4. Hi lovely, I thought you might like this post from another blog I read: http://allbuttonedup.typepad.com/all_buttoned_up/2012/03/not-done-not-even-close.html. Perhaps you are already aware of her. Smooches from us! ~s

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